fammin

7 Reasons Why Intergenerational Ministry is Important

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

“I am beginning to understand how important it is to connect the generations in my church across generations for the purpose of discipleship, but I feel like when I try to share that with others, they don’t get it. How do I help the people I work and worship with understand why I think this is important?”

Have you ever felt this way or asked this question? If so, I promise you that you are not alone. In fact, when I first start working with a church, doing an initial consult, or just striking up a conversation, this is often one of the first things I get asked. So, what’s the answer?

The answer is… there is no answer. I mean, there is no simple answer. But there are important foundational truths that can help you begin to answer people’s questions as they come up. Below is a simple list of 7 possible answers to the question of “Why?’ along with some places to start sharing about the need for generational discipleship to be a primary focus in your church’s ministry. It’s not exhaustive, but it is a good start and I hope it will be a helpful tool for you as you enter into important conversations with your faith community.

So, why should a church “do” Intergenerational Ministry? 

1. Because that’s the Discipleship Model in Scripture. Brian Haynes, pastor of Bay Area First Baptist Church in Houston, TX and author of the book Shift, says that it is of utmost importance to base every action and proposed action of your ministry in theology, in the Word of God.  The Bible is chock full of examples and exhortations that help us understand how faith is passed from one generation to another. For more on that, including specific examples, check out this post.

2. Because the Research tell us. The Sticky Faith group at Fuller Youth Institute have studied the reasons young people walk away from the church, looking for a “silver bullet” for churches and parents to use to keep that from happening.  While there was no “silver bullet” churches that encouraged intergenerational connections and worship and youth that felt involved and connected to the larger church had a much greater chance of remaining in church post high school. (The findings can be found here). Additionally, they found that time spent talking and living faith in the home was the biggest indicator of a faith that sticks in kids.  According to Jim Burns at HomeWord ministries, kids that talk about their faith at home with mom and dad have a 80% chance of remaining in church once they leave the home.

3. Because Faith Formation is a Lifelong Process. By the age of 9 a child has already formed his or her basic moral foundation and by age 13 they’ve come to an understanding about God, His love, and eternity. But, we don’t stop there.  According to research done by James Fowler on faith formation, our faith continues to transform and grow throughout our lives as we move through stages of reflection, resolution, and redemption. And guess what? We need each other for that! In a study published in 2017, researchers found that three things are necessary for intergenerational learning, 1. There must be space to learn about one’s own generation with other generations, 2. All generations must act as learners and teachers at the same time, and 3. The learning must motivate participants towards in a particular way. (Source). In church, the “way” is Jesus and the “learning” is discipleship.

4. Because Time doesn’t Stand Still. Studies show that on average, kids will spend about 24-40 hours a year at church.  Contrast that with the estimated 2,000-3,000 hours they will spend at home or with their parents (For more on this, click here).  If we want faith to be a significant, ongoing part of their lives, we need to connect the home with the faith community through meaningful relationships and ongoing connection.

5. Because Parents need the Church. Most parents of elementary-aged kids today grew up in churches that had age-segregated, traditional models.  Many times faith was compartmentalized and not talked about at home.  Because of that, parents don’t know how to talk about their faith or worship with their children.  They need help.  They need supported.  They need ministry. They need their faith community to do what they promised on baptism or dedication day and walk with them as they raise their kids in the faith.

6. Because the Next Generation need the Church. An average child will be engaged in some kind of media (television, video games, social network, etc.) for 40 hours a week. Remember that statistic about church?  At most, 40 hours a YEAR at church.  The messages they receive all week long cannot be addressed in one hour on a Sunday morning.  Kids need a church family that is engaged in their faith walk in the everyday so that faith is not a “Sunday thing” but a life thing.

7. Because God calls us to Make Disciples. The final commission left to the church by Jesus was to “Go and make disciples.” Discipleship goes beyond church membership, service attendance, or biblical assent.  Being a disciple means being a follower and imitator of Christ and making disciples means leading others to do the same.  As Paul says, “Follow me as I follow Christ.”  Generational discipleship calls us to bridge the generational gap and strive towards a community that truly worships, learns, serves, laughs, cries, and grows together.

Sometimes all we need is a starting point. Hopefully, this post fulfills that need for you.

Let me know what other answers you have to the question of “Why Intergen?”

Ready to Start, Not Sure Where?

ReFocus Ministry is pleased to present a four-part webinar series on generational discipleship and connection for churches interested in exploring intergenerational ministry both in their church and in their homes. Each session will focus on a unique aspect of gathering generations together, both the challenges and opportunities, as well as practical tips to begin implementing now during this time away from regular church gatherings.

Sessions can be attended individually or all four can be attended as a series.

Session 1 – ReConnect. This first session of the webinar focuses on defining generations, generation gap, and the need for generational discipleship in your church. This is the “What” behind generational discipleship.

Session 2 – ReGenerate. This session focuses on the the research, the reasons, and the heart behind connecting generations from both a secular and spiritual viewpoint. This is the “Why” behind generational discipleship.

Session 3 – ReProduce. This session offers practical tips, strategies, and ideas to being connecting generations in your faith community and in homes in meaningful, lasting, life-changing ways. This is the “How” behind generational discipleship.

Session 4 – ReLease. It’s time to go and do! This session will provide a discussion and debrief around the questions, “What? So What? Now What?” and give you an starting point for incorporating generational discipleship as a meaningful part of your faith community. This is the “Who” behind generational discipleship at your church and in your home!

For More Information about how you and your church can participate in this webinar experience, fill out the Contact Form Below with “ReConnect” as your subject.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blog

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She recently graduated with a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

Advertisement

Not Coming Back

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

In my line of work, it doesn’t take too long for me to recognize trends in the churches I work with and receive messages from and lately there has been one common thread: Our families aren’t coming back. More precisely, the parents aren’t coming back. And because of that, the kids aren’t coming back.

I predict that we will soon be entering a time where more and more kids will be coming back to church without parents/caregivers present or at least not present in the way they once were.

When we serve in family ministry, our goal is to equip and resource the home in ways that promote faith formation and spiritual discipleship primarily by parents and caregivers. But what happens when a child comes to our church and there isn’t intentional faith formation happening at home? How can we serve the families and the children in ways that honor them and still allow for faith formation to take place?

In addition to doing our best to engage the family and minister to the parents as noted here, we also want to make sure our church is an environment that is prepared to be welcoming and inviting to everyone.

Here are some practical ways your family ministry can minister to kids who come alone

Create a Place to Belong – There’s nothing worse than feeling out of place and awkward.  But there’s nothing better than feeling like you are a necessary part of something.  There are lots of roles that need filled in preparing and completing a worship service.  Finding a place for that child to serve can give a strong sense of self-worth. (younger kids can help hand out bulletins, help with greeting, be your “right hand man”; older kids can read Scripture, help with sound/lights, participate on worship teams, help collect communion)

Know Each Person’s Name –  Being greeted each week by name says “You are welcome here. We want you here and we are excited that you are part of our church family!” And, as best as we can, know the names of their family members so we can ask about them and how they are doing.

Talk about Home – Just because parents/caregivers may not be present in the church building, it doesn’t mean you can’t talk about the home with that child. In fact, kids may want and need support if they are trying to live out their faith at home. Ask about how they are doing, what’s going on in their family, be supportive and give them that space to share.

Assign “Welcoming” Families – Before events like VBS that will likely bring more kids into your church, approach a few families and ask them if they’d be willing to “adopt” a child for the activities that day or week.  If your church has intergenerational services where kids attend, find families or even grandparents that will welcome the child to worship with them.

Always Invite the Whole Family  – If you are having a picnic, make sure to invite the whole family.  A word of caution – it can be hard on that child to have to constantly hand deliver invites or handouts that their parents might not want or show appreciation for.  If at all possible, make the contact yourself so that the child isn’t in an awkward position.

Appreciate WHO they are – Don’t let their identity be “The kid who comes without his/her parents.”  They are a beautiful and unique child of God.  A colleague of mine shared this with me about his own experience: “Once upon a time, when I was one of those kids (at church sans family), I appreciated being taken seriously on my own, not as a spare part (like so many singles do!)” 

Host Cross-Generational Events– Instead of all events being focused on family groups, host events where all generations mingle and fellowship regardless of age or relationship.  One family minister I know has round tables and the simple rules are 1. You can’t sit with anyone you are related to and 2. You can’t sit with anyone your age.  Her church has grown to love these times of intentional intergenerational connection and no one feels singled out.

As tempting as it is to press forward in an attempt to return to “normal”, we need to be careful not to bring our pre-Covid mentality into our post-Covid reality. We have all be formed and changed by the past year, kids most of all. Our homes and our lives look different. Let’s do our best to reach people where they are and share the love of Christ with all we have the chance to interact with, no matter what it looks like.

It’s Time To ReFocus

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About ReFocus

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree who serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ. She is also wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and pastor at Plowshares BIC.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

Kids IN Church, Not Kid’s Church

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

In a church I once served in during the Sunday morning sermon, the pastor asked the congregation if they knew the fruits of the Spirit.  The whole congregation started out strong but by the end, there was one group was still heartily reciting the fruit. That group? The kids. I couldn’t help but smile. I’m not sure how many others noticed, but the kids sure did. I had more than one come up to me afterwards and say something to the effect of “Miss Christina, did you hear us?  We knew all the fruits!”

It was in that moment that I became aware of something I think is vitally important for us (and by us, I mean, adults in church) to grasp.

Kids in church doesn’t mean church for kids.  

So many times I’ve heard concerns expressed that if children are brought into the larger church service, that service has to become all about the kids. But that’s actually opposite of the intention of bringing kids into the larger congregational environment.  The heart behind including the children isn’t to make it all about them, but to invite them into the communal context, to let them experience corporate worship and participate in the liturgy as active members of the body.

HERE’S WHAT INTERGENERATIONAL WORSHIP IS NOT.

Glorified Sunday School (with adults invited)

One common concern expressed from those who are uncertain as to how to include children in worship is that the church service will turn into a child-centric Sunday school hour with parents and grandparents observing. It’s an understandable reaction because in many churches the only time children are in the worship service is for a special program or performance that is geared towards them or is starring them. If that’s the only experience the adults in church have had with children in corporate worship, it would be reasonable to feel concern over what will happen if the kids are there more frequently. But that’s not what intergenerational worship is. 

“Big” Church

Another concern that is frequently shared is that kids are not mature enough to deal with certain themes that are found in Scripture. One video shared by a large, well-known church showed the pastor getting up to read the most provocative verses in Song of Solomon and a wide-eyed young man whose shocked mother puts her hands over his ears; the tag line reads, “Big Church is for Grown-ups.” Let’s be realistic – the vast majority of churches aren’t reading these few verses on a Sunday AND if they are, the pastor usually knows well in advance and can prepare parents for what will be shared.

Creating a worship service geared towards only one age group every Sunday limits the body of Christ and is never exampled for us in Scripture or in Jesus’ teachings.

To be clear, I am not opposed to age-appropriate ministry; there is a need for it and I am a strong advocate for children’s, youth, and various ages of adult ministry, but not to the exclusion of the including everyone in times of corporate worship.

Family Worship

Many churches host fabulous family worship events and experiences that encourage families to engage in discipleship, teaching, and worship experiences as a group. They are wonderful times for the family to grow together in Christ and with each other. However, most often these events are centered around the idea of family interacting and focusing on one another, worshipping as a unit and learning as a whole.

Intergenerational worship as a church body isn’t focused on the family but rather on the body of Christ as a whole. While families are together, they are not interacting with one another; rather they are joining their church family in worship and interacting with God and the body of Christ.

SO IF ALL OF THAT IT WHAT INTERGENERATIONAL WORSHIP IS NOT…THEN WHAT IS IT?

In his book, The Church of All Ages: Generations Worshiping Together, Howard Vanderwell states that intergenerational worship is “worship in which people of every age are understood to be equally important.”  It’s where age fades into the distance and the focus becomes the body of Christ and all its parts. And it’s not easy. Fundamentally, all of these different age groups have different developmental needs. Each age understands differently, interacts differently, and learns differently. Each brings unique gifts, generational experiences, and certain expectations. 

So, how do you navigate these waters in a way that is fruitful for everyone?  Ultimately it doesn’t come down to programming or ministry practices; it comes down to hearts. When age becomes “invisible” and kids are no longer cute because they are performing and adults are no longer the real church because they are “big,” there is a place where intergenerational worship can happen.

There’s no perfect plan or way to do it “right.” It takes time and it takes work because in many ways it feels like a new thing (even though intergenerational worship is a very old thing). It isn’t going to look the same in every church. Some may have more hands-on interaction while others may engage in more traditional liturgical practices, some may be weekly services while others during specific days or service times.  But what will look the same is this – the whole church will be worshiping…together. 

“Congregations serious about intergenerational worship learn to value what every age offers. This includes being willing to learn together and including all ages in worship leading and worship content.” – Joan Huyser-Honig

What made that moment in church so special wasn’t that the kids knew the fruits of the Spirit. Sure, as the director of children and family ministry, that made me very happy. And yes, as a mom, it did my heart good to hear my girls recite Scripture.

What made it special was that in the middle of a normal Sunday sermon, a bunch of kids and a group of adults came together and shared a moment of mutual edification and communal growth.

THEY WERE TOGETHER. 

Is Your Church READY to Come Together?

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About ReFocus

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree who serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ. She is also wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and pastor at Plowshares BIC.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

It’s Noisy Out There: Why We Need Intergenerational Community

/ Christina Embree / 1 Comment

My family loves to make fun of me for my restless nights. Any noise at night will wake me up and getting back to sleep is a chore. When I think about what keeps me up at night, the first thing that comes to mind is “Everything!”

But, as I reflect, I realize what really keeps me up at night is the noise. Not necessarily actual noises but the noise that fills this world; the anger, the hurt, the hatred, the sadness. It breaks my heart because I fear we can’t hear one another because of all the noise.

But in the morning, when I quiet myself and listen to God, the noise quiets and His voice beckons to places of grace, healing, love, and joy. I long for others to experience that peaceful place too.

That is why I am so passionate about connecting generations within churches to one another in meaningful relationships and corporate worship.

It’s not about championing a program or jumping onboard a movement. It’s about cutting through the noise and creating spaces where we can both hear and be heard; where our center is the gentle, beckoning voice of God and our experience is one of openness and humility.

Our kids are being raised in a time where, if left to their own devices, they would rarely interact with generations beyond theirs.

The noise is deafening. 

  • A recent study on kids’ app usage and habits show that kids ages four to 15 now spend an average of 85 minutes per day watching YouTube videos, compared with 80 minutes per day spent on TikTok. YouTube, not surprisingly, remains one of the most-used apps among children, the study found (Source).
  • Another study tells us that kids ages 8-12 are involved in video games via a console 44 minutes a day, on a mobile device 34 minutes a day, and on a computer 11 minutes a day (Source).
  • All in all, on average, children ages 8-12 in the United States spend 4-6 hours a day watching or using screens, and teens spend up to 9 hours (Source).

But in a loving and intentional community of faith, the volume can be lowered and other voices heard.

  • Studies show us that the development of conversation and social skills is dependent upon opportunities for children to interact with peers and adults, as part of supportive and enriching experiences (Source).
  • Studies have also shown us that intergenerational relationships have proven to be the most impactful way of stimulating faith development among children, youth, and adults (Source).

In healthy relationships, in community, in family – we can hear.

What keeps me motivated to continue sharing with churches and homes the need for intergenerational relationships and ministry? The desire to help us find places of peace with one another in the midst of the noise.  We need each other if we are to ever find rest in this world.

God has created us for community; behold, how good and how pleasant it is (Ps. 133:1).

A shortened version of this article first appear here.

It’s Time To ReFocus

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About ReFocus

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

Summer Family Activity Packet: Journey With Paul

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

Over the interesting year that was 2020, I began giving the families at my church quarterly discipleship packets they could do at home with their kids. This summer I put together what I simply called a Summer Family Activity Pack that lets them explore the journeys of Paul in a new a different way. Rather than simply re-telling many of the same stories that many Sunday School and church curriculums focus on, these five activities invite the family to engage with the people, places and teachings of Paul.

Journeying with Paul

Included in Packet:

Family Photo Scavenger Hunt

Family Olympics

Water Balloon Battle

Family Garden

Picnic in the Park

Perhaps you’ve been looking for a way to help households from your church intentionally engage with one another around faith formation and Scripture this summer; if so, feel free to use the materials below!

NOTE: You will need to purchase the supplies for each activity; I found most of my items on Amazon and at the Dollar Tree. See the supply list at the end of the packet materials.

Activity #1 – The Gospel According to Paul, Family Photo Scavenger Hunt

In I Corinthians 15:1-5, Paul explains the gospel that he preaches to those he visits in his journey. He writes, “Now, brothers and sisters, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain. For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Cephas, and then to the Twelve.”

Use the Photo Scavenger Hunt found at this link for this fun family activity.

Once you have taken all of your photos, send them to [email address] and we will compile them for you and give you a framed collage of your family’s photo scavenger hunt experience looking for Jesus!

Activity #2- Family Night: Olympic Edition

Paul’s Missionary Journeys

Jumping into Paul’s Journeys

Using the sidewalk chalk in the packet, draw a traditional Hopscotch shape on the sidewalk. Instead of numbers in each block, put the names of the cities that Paul visited on his first missionary journey. Find a stone to throw and jump through the countries in traditional hopscotch fashion to visit all the cities that Paul visited. Once someone lands on a city, mark it off. The person who lands on the final city “wins.”

    • Antioch in Syria Acts 13:1-3
    • Selucia Acts 13:4
    • Cyprus Acts 13:4
    • Salamis Acts 13:5
    • Paphos Acts 13:6
    • Perga Acts 13:13
    • Antioch in Pisidia Acts 13:14
    • Iconium Acts 13:51
    • Lyrstra Acts 14:6
    • Derbe Acts 14:6 and Acts 14:20

It’s a Toss Up:  Meeting Paul’s Friends

Using the enclosed bean bags and plates, create a Bean Bag toss game by laying out the plates and trying to land on them with bean bags. Each plate has the name of one of Paul’s friends and the Scripture reference where you can find them in the Bible. Whoever “meets” the most of Paul’s friends, “wins.”

    • Lydia, Acts 16:11-15
    • Priscilla, Acts 18
    • Barnabas, Acts 9:26-27
    • Silas, Acts 16: 25-36
    • Timothy, 2 Tim. 2:2-6
    • Phoebe, Rom. 16:1-2
    • Junia, Rom. 16:7
    • Titus, Titus 1:4-5

Frisbee Relay: Journeying together

Using the foldable flying discs in your packet, partner up with a family member. Paul and Silas can be one team; Paul and Barnabas can be another (if you have five family members, Timothy can join this group).  Pick a section of your yard or a park you want to cover and have the first person throw the disc, then the second, then the first, until you reach the other side. Talk to your kids about how Paul had companions who helped him finish his journeys.

Ring Toss: Third Time’s the Charm

Paul went on three missionary journeys, his final landing him in Rome. Set out four cones, including the one labeled “Rome.”  Use the rings in the packet to toss around the cones. The first person toss the ring around all three cones and then around Rome “wins.”  Even though Paul knew that he would likely end up in jail and dying in Rome, he went there because God told him to and because of that we have much of the New Testament.

Activity #3 – WATER BALLOON BATTLE

Get ready for some fun on a hot day! We can imagine that Paul’s journeys took him through some HOT places. Grab a Bible and look at the maps of Paul’s 3 missionary journeys. And then, pick a hot day to have some family fun;  Included in your packet is a water balloon “Bunch of Balloons” for you to fill and toss. HAVE FUN as a family!!

Activity #4 – Family Garden

Only God Can Make It Grow

We’ve been looking at Paul’s story over the summer and Paul talks about how sharing about God with others is like planting a seed. In I Cor 3:5-9, he shares about how he and another person named Apollos both helped to plant God’s story in people but only God can make it grow. You have some seeds and planters so that you can plant the seed and water it, but only the God could make all the sun and water and soil grow that plant. Have fun gardening together with God!

Who do you think Paul is, anyway? Or Apollos, for that matter? Servants, both of us—servants who waited on you as you gradually learned to entrust your lives to our mutual Master. We each carried out our servant assignment. I planted the seed, Apollos watered the plants, but God made you grow. It’s not the one who plants or the one who waters who is at the center of this process but God, who makes things grow. Planting and watering are menial servant jobs at minimum wages. What makes them worth doing is the God we are serving. You happen to be God’s field in which we are working.

Activity #5 – Picnic at the Park

Sharing Together

Use the basket your Family Summer Activity Packet came with to pack a picnic lunch and head to the park. While there, ask your kids how they think Paul might have felt as he walked through places he had never been on his missionary journey and met new people and shared Jesus with them. Share the story of Priscilla and Aquila who invited them into their home and shared their life and food with him. As you share this meal together, think about how you can bless each other and others, including strangers, by sharing what you have with them. Maybe even in the park today, you will see someone to share God’s love with today.

Priscilla and Aquila were tentmakers as was Paul. Priscilla and Aquila had been among the Jews expelled from Rome by the Roman Emperor Claudius in the year 49 as written by Suetonius. They ended up in Corinth. Paul lived with Priscilla and Aquila for approximately 18 months. Their story with Paul is in Acts 18.

SUPPLY LIST

  • Printed Out Scavenger Hunt
  • Sidewalk Chalk
  • Bean Bags and Paper Plates with Names/Scriptures on them
  • Frisbees
  • Rings and Cones
  • Water Balloons (I recommend Bunch o’ Balloons)
  • Seed Packets and Seed Starter cartons
  • Basket and Tablecloth

It’s Time To ReFocus

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About ReFocus

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

The Mosaic Challenge

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

“I tie my shoe using the bunny ears method because that is how my grandfather did it and I learned from him. I always get a Venti Americano with soy milk at Starbucks because on my first visit to Starbucks, the person I went with ordered that and I did the same and it became my go-to. I put milk in my eggs when I scramble them because mom said it makes it fluffier and I always knock three times on doors because my dad did that when he was a salesman and brought me along on his calls.”

This is the Mosiac Challenge that is currently making its way around TikTok. The premise? “Everyone is a #Mosaic of the people around them, so tell us where you come from.” It’s well worth a few minutes of your time to listen to some of the stories and the beauty of the community that makes up each person.

And while this is trending on this social media platform right now, it should come as no surprise to those of us that ascribe to the belief that each person, each human being, is created in the image of God, the Triune God, the ultimate mosaic and picture of community.

I have long been captured by the idea that each person is really a small community. Dennis Kinlaw, a respected theologian, once wrote, “The fact that people come in families is clearly an aspect of what it means for us to be made in the image of God. Every person we have ever met, or will ever meet, has parents. When you see one, you know that there are, or were, two more, and if you find the two, you know that there are, or were, four more” (Source). In other words, it takes two to make you. We are each inextricably connected in community from the day we were formed, both reflecting the communion of two human being and the community of the image of God.

We are Mosaics.

This has so many implications for how we live, learn, and grow. And, just like the statements above that reveal the influence people have on our actions and preferences, the influences of our community shape our faith and reflect our beliefs.

In her book, Almost Christian, Kenda Creasy Dean states in her book, ““Adults need spiritual apprenticeships as much as their children do—and adults need them first. Group spiritual direction, covenant groups, practice in oral prayer, lay leadership in worship, singing hymns and praise songs—and of course, the formal practice of testimony itself—are congregational practices that give adults, and not just teenagers, opportunities to put faith into words.” In other words, this whole idea of generational discipleship is not limited to childhood, but it most certainly should encompass children and youth along with all other ages.

If I were to offer a Faith Mosaic Challenge, it would look like this:

“When my kids go to school, I pray for them each morning because my mom used to always pray for me. When I want to look up a word in the Bible, I often still pull out a concordance even though I could use the internet because I was always fascinated when my dad would pull his out when working on a teaching. I love the hymn ‘In the Garden’ because it was my Grandma’s favorite and always reminds me of her. In the evenings, as I fall asleep, I tend to use the Ignatian Examen and prayerfully review my day, because one of my seminary professors shared his own end-of-day practice with me. I do my best praying when I’m walking or cooking or cleaning because a mentor told me that she connected with God best when her hands were busy but her mind could focus on God. I am a Christian because of the many people who poured into my life as I was growing up and pointed me to Jesus.”

This is what generational discipleship is all about. It’s the passing of our faith from one generation to another. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Our faith doesn’t accidentally get passed on by way of a good book or a great worship song. Our faith is passed from one generation to another. It is passed in relational community.

Discipleship isn’t about downloading information from one person to another. It’s not even about learning more about the Bible or Jesus or our faith. Discipleship will always be about following Jesus and that is done, not as lone rangers, but in the community of believers, the body of Christ, the Church. The final outcome of these times of meaningful connections will be churches and homes that function in unity and community in mentoring and discipling the next generation.

I’d love to hear your Mosaic Story; who has poured into you and what has shaped you to be the believer you are today? And how are you pouring into and helping to shape others? We are all mosaics, every single one, and that is part of the beauty of humanity and the kingdom of God.

It’s Time To ReFocus

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blo

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

Our “Church Box” is Way Too Small

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

There are times that my mind is stirred by a memory; this weekend was one of those time. My oldest daughter went to prom and there she was, all decked out in her beautiful dress, twirling like a princess, her face beaming with happiness. And it brought this experience from her childhood to mind and with that, this blog post, which I’ve shared before but it absolutely bears sharing again.

When our oldest daughter was preschool age, she was obsessed with The Nutcracker Suite. Well, let’s be honest, it was the Barbie version, but she loved it. She would dress up like a princess and dance around the house pretending that she was the star of the show. When the Nutcracker came to town for holidays, my husband asked her to go with him. They dressed in their finest; she even got put her hair in an up-do, and off they went.

It was a long show. There were many in attendance, almost all older than her. While she loved being with her dad and seeing the show, she was also a preschooler so she wiggled and squirmed and squealed and giggled. She had to go to the bathroom. She got hungry and wanted snacks.

But when she got home, she beamed.

I asked her to tell me about it and all she could remember was the scene with The Rat King (Oooo…scary!).

I asked Luke to tell me about it and much of what he could remember was her wiggliness. But then I asked if people seemed bothered by her and he said, “No. Actually I had a few people compliment me on bringing her to the ballet.”

I posted an adorable picture of their date on Facebook and many similar comments were posted, things like, “So good that you are giving her this experience at such a young age” and “This is exactly what kids should be experiencing.”

Surprisingly not one person commented, “Hmm, seems like a waste of money to me. I mean, did she even understand anything?” Nobody criticized us for forcing her to sit through a long performance filled with imagery and dialogue she couldn’t follow. No one complained about her fidgeting or her outbursts. And nobody questioned whether this was beneficial for her.

Because everyone recognized, it wasn’t about her understanding the “story” of The Nutcracker Suite or her watching the ballet with a critical eye or even her sitting still through the performance.

It was about giving her an experience, a total package, filled with sights and sounds and smells and stories that could be felt and experienced even if they couldn’t be understood or comprehended.

A few years ago, a mom shared with me that the reason her kids didn’t join us in Kids Church is because every now and then she wants to them to get to experience the traditional service at church, to hear the liturgy, to listen to the hymns, to be a part of a service that replicates the services that she grew up in and that have been part of their family’s tradition.

You see, for this mom, it’s not about her children understanding each word of the sermon or comprehending the history of the liturgy or the meaning of the hymns. It about the total package; the experience of being in church, surrounded by the things that have been formational for generations and by the people who make up the body of Christ.  These children get to be seen, they get to see, and they get to experience church. 

The church experience is much bigger than a sermon.

Big or little, child or adult, the sermon is only part of the whole experience. Not understanding the sermon in no way negates the rest of the experience. Seeing the people. Singing the songs. Giving our tithes and God’s offerings. Praying, at your seat or at the altar or in small groups or corporately as a whole church. Reading Scripture. Reciting psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Smelling the incense. Tasting the communion elements. Serving. Celebrating. Fellowshipping. Communing with God and with each other.

It’s a total package.

And much of what is included in that package is not comprehended through the mind, but through the heart. It’s not things that require a certain level of development but things that are experienced through the senses and understood through emotions. A sense of belonging, a place in community, an important part of a body. All of that can be experienced, regardless of age. When we squish church into a box that can be experienced only by adults in less than an hour…we miss the point, we miss the whole idea of church. And that is why it is so easy for people to leave the church, because what they are leaving isn’t really the church, it’s the box we’ve created for church to fit into.

Yesterday, in our small church, a teenager led worship, a 3rd grader read the Psalm, a 4th grader helped lead communion, and the adults shared prayers and praises from one generation to another. It was so much more than just any one of these things alone. As adults, we can recognize that there is more to the church service than just the sermon or the worship or the program of events. The same holds true for children too. Giving them the opportunity to experience the total package is a gift; whether they understand parts of it or not.

A version of the post first appeared in January 2018 on this blog.

It’s Time To ReFocus

Are you interested in moving your church from a traditional, age-segregated into a more family-focused, intergenerational focus, connecting the home and the church?  

Refocus Ministry would be happy to begin a conversation with your team and church about the how your church can grow in serving the families of your church and community and connecting your faith community in relationship with each other.  

Ongoing coaching through various means is also available as your church continues the transition including weekly emails, monthly on-line trainings, and continued conversations. In addition to one-on-one coaching calls and follow-up resources, the following large-group presentations can be made available to your team, pastoral staff, or congregation.

Options to choose from for these presentations include:

  1. Presenting on a Sunday morning to your worship service(s)
  2. A parent webinar on Everyday Discipleship and partnering with the church community
  3. A presentation on Connecting Generations (importance, need, Biblical foundation) for your leadership team
  4. A training on a specific area of ministry such as Family VBS, Partnering with Parents, Equipping Volunteers, Creating an Intergenerational Culture for your ministry or leadership team.
  5. OTHER – We will work to create a presentation that best suits your community’s needs

Use the contact form below to receive a customized quote for your congregations needs. We look forward to journeying with you to make Psalm 145, one generation to another, part of our church’s DNA.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blo

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The advertisements on this page are chose by the web host and do not necessarily reflect the views of ReFocus Ministry.

One Size Doesn’t Fit All: Five Ideas for Worshiping Together

/ Christina Embree / 1 Comment

This morning, our family woke up and the usual morning line-up of breakfast, coffee, gathering school items, solidifying after-school plans, quick prayer, kiss on the cheek and fly out the door took place. If you know, you know. On my way out the door, I found myself reminiscing about the slower pace of our lives last year where we didn’t wake up and immediately scatter to the winds. As glad as I am that we are re-engaging with life, I must admit… I rather liked the year of getting to spend lots of quality time with my family.

And I’m not the only one. A recent study found that over half of parents weren’t “ready” to get back to pre-Covid lifestyles and 39% of kids agreed. Some families have found this time together to be not only a healthy experience for their family, but one that they don’t want to lose. Even before Covid hit, 87% of families indicated they were often looking for ways to spend time together.

What better place for that to happen than within the faith community? What if instead of returning to “life as normal” post-Covid, this could be a time to begin to intentionally find spaces for families to worship, grow, and learn about God together in church?

It’s important to recognize that each church has a unique culture, community and mission, so there isn’t a “one size fits all” approach to this type of intergenerational, family-focused ministry. But here are five ideas that might be a place to start.

These ideas come from a variety of different church backgrounds and traditions, so they will not ALL work for your ministry context, but chances are one might strike a chord and you will be able to begin working towards more and more times where the family experiences faith formation together with their faith community.

Family Service Projects – What better way to bring the family together than in an opportunity to serve Christ and others as a unit?  There are many ways to engage the family in service. Check with your local food pantries and Salvation Army to see if there are ways families can work together stocking shelves or organizing donations. Many local soup kitchens or churches who serve meals will welcome family groups to serve together. Check also with local mission and ministries that serve the poor, homeless or other marginalized groups to see how families can offer assistance.

Children and youth express their faith through actions rather than statements of belief. When asked what a Christian is they will say things like, “A person who goes to church” or “A person who does good things, loves others, is kind, serves other, etc”  Engaging the family in the act of serving together can be one of the most transformational and meaningful ways to connect faith with everyday life and create bonds in the family that last long after their time of serving has ended.

Family Worship Sundays – Many churches have begun offering times of Family Worship, often once a month or on fifth Sundays, where the family stays together and worships as a unit. These Sundays should not be confused with Children’s Sundays or times where kids perform for the church. While these are special times for the church as well, they are more focused on children than they are families.

A Family Sunday will incorporate ways for the family to experience worship together such as communion, prayers said aloud with the whole church, worship songs that everyone know and can sing to, a sermon that is appropriate for all ages and elements of the service that invite participation of parents/caregivers and children such as Scripture readings by families and prayer as families. For ideas on how to include families in worship on Sunday, check out this article: https://childrensministry.com/intergenerational-worship/

Family Worship Experiences – There are a few subtle difference between a Family Worship Sunday, where the family joins with the whole congregation in a regular worship service time, and Family Worship Experiences where families are specifically targeted and ministered to. Often these experiences take place at a time other than Sunday morning and incorporate a variety of interactive activities, worship, and teaching.

Some great examples can be found at www.dandibell.com and if you want a group to come in to host, Seeds Family Worship has one they do in connection with Phil Vischer and What’s in the Bible? with Buck Denver.

Family Faith Formation – For some, inviting the family to stay together takes place best in a mid-week experience. One church I served at chose this path to help the family grow and learn together. We had so much fun using these nights to explore the Bible together. We wrote our own curriculum in 5-week blocks based on what families have indicated they want to learn. Each household unit sat in chairs in a circle and explore Scripture, do activities, and participate in a time of affirmation and blessing each night. Our topics have included Prayer, Salvation, The Bible, God as Creator, and Service. This curriculum has been updated with both Gathered and Scattered items!

Kids absolutely love spending this time with their parents. Of all the programs we had at that church, this one got the highest praise from children. You can receive a discounted copy of the first five-week block of this curriculum by filling out the contact form below and putting “Family Faith Formation” in the Subject line!

Family Activities – If your church isn’t ready yet to host a Family Sunday or Family Worship Experience, one idea is to begin hosting Family Activities on a monthly basis. These activities should have as their central theme the idea of having family spend time together either with/around the larger faith community, around service to the larger community, or around worship and the Word as a family unit. Putting these focuses on a rotating basis can help your families begin to spend intentional time together around the topics of faith, community, and outreach.

For instance, one month you could host a Family Game Night at church (time with faith community), and the next offer an activity that families can do at home that include a Faith Talk and time in God’s word (time with worship/Word), and then the next month offer a service experience in the community that families can do together (outreach). By offering a variety of ways for families to come together around the themes of faith, community, and service, you can begin to cultivate times of faith formation for the whole family to engage in together.

This list is by no means exhaustive and I know there are many more ideas out there. I would love for this to be a place where we can share our thoughts and ideas in the comments below. What is your church doing to allow households to gather and grow together within your faith community?

Let’s Get Started Together!

ReFocus Ministry is excited to offer “Everyday Discipleship: A Workshop for Parents/Caregivers.” 

This one-hour workshop covers an unlimited number of parents from your church to join us for a seminar including an Everyday Discipleship worksheet and follow-up resources for parents/caregivers focused on helping support and equip parents for faith formation in their homes.

This workshop has been widely attended by both ministers and parents alike with positive feedback on how it changed their perspective on discipleship in the home and got them excited about sharing their faith with their kids.

This webinar uses a Zoom format and is set up with an individualized code for your church only. All resources will be emailed prior to the webinar so you can distribute to parents with your regular communication.

Interested in learning more?

Fill out the form below with the Message: Everyday Discipleship and we will be in touch!

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blog

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She holds a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry and is completing a Doctorate of Ministry in Spiritual Formation at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

Why Stay Where You Are Not Wanted?

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

It’s been a while since I blogged. Part of that was intentional; I was away for a class and chose to put my focus there for a week. Part of it was simply a feeling of being completely and utterly overwhelmed by the state of this world and, more specifically, my interactions with Millennials and Gen Z-ers who are deconstructing their faith.

If you’ve followed my blog for any length of time, you know that I am passionate about connecting generations in meaningful relationships with the context of the church and the home. And you also know that one of the motivating factors for this particular passion is the diminishing numbers of the above generations represented in our church communities.

But here is what I am discovering in my many conversations with those who are deconstructing their faith and some choosing to leave the church as a result; some, if not most, of these individuals are not leaving because they weren’t taught the Bible or regularly attended youth group or even engaged with the larger church community. Many not only grew up faithfully attending church but they served in positions like youth volunteer/leader or worship leader or had the pedigree of pastor’s kid or missionary family or seminary student.

These were the ones we never thought would leave; in fact, these were the ones we thought would lead.

So what happened?

I have heard and continue to hear the same story: We were not wanted.

And it goes like this:

“As I grew older, I began to see people in the church say and do things that didn’t seem to line up with what I had been taught by those same people about God, about His love, about Christianity, and about the Bible. As I studied the Bible more and began to ask questions, people began to pull away from me. I was warned about “falling away” and “losing my faith” but no one seemed to want to actually sit down and answer my questions. When I spoke up about what I was seeing and reading and believing on social media, my Christian friends turned against me. Some of the things said to me were hateful, beyond unkind. But…. my non-Christian friends were the ones who stood up for me. They listened to me. I could ask my questions, express my doubt, call out the inconsistencies and search for answers and they were never rude to me or questioned my faith. I still believe in Jesus but I don’t want to be a part of the church. They caused me so much hurt, trauma, and despair that I would rather not associate with people who say they love Jesus but act like that.”

Obviously, this isn’t a word-for-word conversation that I’ve had with someone but it is a general compilation of what so many are experiencing. Not one person I’ve interacted with set out with the goal of leaving the church; they simply had some serious questions and concerns. And before our defenses rise up and begin to defend why we “can’t compromise” and we must “resist the false prophet” and all of that, pause for one second and just hear what is being said.

These are not nameless, faceless people. These are children who grew up in our churches, sat in our Sunday School classes, and sang our songs. They memorized Bible verses and attended our VBS. They volunteered for the mission trip and led worship from the front of the congregation. They are Josiah and Sarah and Madison and Luke and all the other names that popped into your mind as you read.

When I talk about connecting generations in meaningful relationships for the purpose of discipleship, it’s not so that we can download information about our faith into an empty, waiting vessel and create clones of ourselves. True discipleship doesn’t make someone look like me; it leads someone to follow Jesus and He does the work of making all of us look like Him (2 Cor. 3:18). It’s not so the older generations can simply reprove, correct, and instruct the next generations (We’ve got Scripture for that, 2 Tim. 3:16); it’s so that we can mutually learn from one another and together grow into Christ who is our Head (Eph. 4:15).

Discipleship at home and in the church must leave room for the hard conversations without the hard line rejection. Unity in Christ is not the same as uniformity in our culture, doctrine and worldview.

But as long as we make it that, the story above is going to continue to be experienced over and over again on repeat. There are loving and gracious ways for us to disagree about non-essentials without excluding someone from our community.

If our role, right now, today, is to work with children, youth, and families in a ministry context, we must meet this challenge head on by creating safe spaces for doubt, discouragement and disbelief as individuals “work out their salvation” (Phil. 2:12) without severing the ties of community and grace. And we must keep in the forefront that while we are called to make disciples of all people, young and old, we are not called to keep our attendance numbers in church or denomination intact. We’re called to share the love and light of Christ; to love God and to love people.

Cultivate a culture of embrace rather than exclusion.

And if we see the tendency in ourselves to shut down, shut out, and defend whenever a question is asked, a doubt is expressed, a different way of interpreting Scripture is shared, or an opposing political, social, or theological view is presented, let us remember these are the children we’ve poured Christ into and take time to listen, to love, and to learn together.

These are not nameless, faithless, faceless “others.” We can’t lump them into groups and reject them. They are ours and they won’t stay where they are not wanted.

Ready to Start, Not Sure Where?

ReFocus Ministry is pleased to present a four-part webinar series on generational discipleship and connection for churches interested in exploring intergenerational ministry both in their church and in their homes. Each session will focus on a unique aspect of gathering generations together, both the challenges and opportunities, as well as practical tips to begin implementing now during this time away from regular church gatherings.

Sessions can be attended individually or all four can be attended as a series.

Session 1 – ReConnect. This first session of the webinar focuses on defining generations, generation gap, and the need for generational discipleship in your church. This is the “What” behind generational discipleship.

Session 2 – ReGenerate. This session focuses on the the research, the reasons, and the heart behind connecting generations from both a secular and spiritual viewpoint. This is the “Why” behind generational discipleship.

Session 3 – ReProduce. This session offers practical tips, strategies, and ideas to being connecting generations in your faith community and in homes in meaningful, lasting, life-changing ways. This is the “How” behind generational discipleship.

Session 4 – ReLease. It’s time to go and do! This session will provide a discussion and debrief around the questions, “What? So What? Now What?” and give you an starting point for incorporating generational discipleship as a meaningful part of your faith community. This is the “Who” behind generational discipleship at your church and in your home!

For More Information about how you and your church can participate in this webinar experience, fill out the Contact Form Below with “ReConnect” as your subject.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blog

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She recently graduated with a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

The Aftermath of Easter

/ Christina Embree / Leave a comment

This week my timeline has been filled with pastors and ministers who are T-I-R-E-D. Many have put together multiple services, led various Holy Week services, hosted a myriad of Easter events from prayer meetings to Easter Egg hunts, and welcomed people back to in-person services with a host of new ways of doing things safely. Too often, I fear, for those of us in ministry and even for those of us to attend services throughout the week, the aftermath of Easter is… weariness.

But, a brief look at Scripture shows us quite a different aftermath to the actual event. If you’ve been around church circles for any length of time, it is likely you have heard a number of the post-Resurrection narratives.

  • The story of Mary at the tomb hearing her name spoken by Jesus and running to tell the disciples.
  • The account of the two people walking to Emmaus that were joined by Jesus and didn’t recognize Him until he joined them for a meal and broke the bread, something they had apparently seen Jesus do before and they ran all the way back to Jerusalem to tell the other followers that they had seen the risen Christ.
  • How Jesus then appeared to all the disciples except Thomas and then came back later so that Thomas could see Him, touch Him, and talk to Him.
  • The story of Peter who Jesus cooked breakfast for and commissioned to “feed My sheep.” 

There was an intensity. There was a virtual blizzard of events. Jesus was alive.

Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 15 that not only did he appear to all of these people, he showed up in a gathering of five hundred. Five hundred firsthand encounters with the risen Christ. 500 firsthand experiences. No names. No stories. Just a brief mention of these 500. What ever happened to their stories?

I mean, technically, we don’t know. But we do know some things. We know that those who experienced firsthand encounters with Jesus felt compelled to share about them; it made their joy complete. We know that those who experienced Jesus didn’t hide their testimony but they shared it openly as we can see all through the book of Acts and the historical writings of many who documented the followers of the Way.

Here’s what I think happened. These people who had experienced the risen Christ COULDN’T CONTAIN their joy. They had to share. To make their joy complete as John says in I John 1:4, they had to tell other people. And in turn those people told other people and those people told other people. 

Friends, our faith is so unique and dynamic. We serve a personal God who interacts with us throughout our lives. He speaks to us through Scripture and song. He reveals himself in creation and one another. For some of us, we hear His whisper in our heart. For others, we experience healing, physical and emotional.

We have firsthand experience of Jesus. We have Easter!

We also hear the testimony of others. We read firsthand accounts. We listen to testimonies and stories of others. We share the experiences of people who have experienced Jesus in their lives.

We get both. We need both.

You see, our joy is made complete, our faith is made whole, when we both experience the risen Christ in our own lives and in the community of believers.

A faith built solely on the experience of others will leave us hopeless.  A faith built solely on our own experience will leave us homeless. 

I believe this is one of the reasons we are seeing a decline in rising generations in the church today. Our segregation of ages has not created the space for firsthand experiences to be shared from one generation to another. Our generational gap doesn’t foster a space for the sharing of personal testimonies and experiences to be passed on through story and song. We are left with generations that are hopeless and homeless.

The rapid spread of Christianity isn’t just because 500+ people had a firsthand experience with Jesus. As they told their story and others heard it and chose to come to faith in Jesus, they had their own firsthand experience. The Holy Spirit was given to them. They came to a place where they too experienced resurrection in their own hearts and minds. And then they shared their story and so on and so on.  Disciples were made. This is discipleship.

I need your testimonies of God’s hand of love and redemption and resurrection in your life. And you need mine. And future generations need ours. Because the firsthand accounts that become secondhand accounts will lead to more firsthand accounts. It is also why we need each other.

Author Wendell Berry once said, “Put your faith in two inches of humus that will build under the trees every thousand years…Laugh. Be joyful though you have considered all the facts….Practice resurrection.”  In other words, plant your seeds of faith. Listen to the testimomies, firsthand and secondhand, make your joy complete. Practice rising to new life. Speak. Share. Sow. Practice resurrection everyday.

Ready to Start, Not Sure Where?

ReFocus Ministry is pleased to present a four-part webinar series on generational discipleship and connection for churches interested in exploring intergenerational ministry both in their church and in their homes. Each session will focus on a unique aspect of gathering generations together, both the challenges and opportunities, as well as practical tips to begin implementing now during this time away from regular church gatherings.

Sessions can be attended individually or all four can be attended as a series.

Session 1 – ReConnect. This first session of the webinar focuses on defining generations, generation gap, and the need for generational discipleship in your church. This is the “What” behind generational discipleship.

Session 2 – ReGenerate. This session focuses on the the research, the reasons, and the heart behind connecting generations from both a secular and spiritual viewpoint. This is the “Why” behind generational discipleship.

Session 3 – ReProduce. This session offers practical tips, strategies, and ideas to being connecting generations in your faith community and in homes in meaningful, lasting, life-changing ways. This is the “How” behind generational discipleship.

Session 4 – ReLease. It’s time to go and do! This session will provide a discussion and debrief around the questions, “What? So What? Now What?” and give you an starting point for incorporating generational discipleship as a meaningful part of your faith community. This is the “Who” behind generational discipleship at your church and in your home!

For More Information about how you and your church can participate in this webinar experience, fill out the Contact Form Below with “ReConnect” as your subject.

For more information about…

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blog

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She recently graduated with a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.